Cheeking meds

Cheeking is not even a word but all correctional nurses know it well. In our jail we used to discontinue all meds that were cheeked. Any attempt to divert or accumulate meds was a huge deal. Now lately our doctor will just have th crushed. This creates more work for us nurses.
I get that is my job but I often feel that nurses are less likely to check for cheeking then.
I also laugh at the excuses inmates give. Amazing how they never feel that pill under their tongue. 

Finally

Considering how long it takes many with PCOS, our six months was not long. We found out today that we are pregnant. Just six weeks. We have decided to keep this pretty private with only a select few knowing. We will announce it publicly at 12 weeks. I am not a good secret keeper so we will see how I do. I have not had a baby in almost 13 years. I feel like so much has changed and yet It's always been the same. I am praying for this baby and our family.

Cancer

My mom is dying of cancer. I hate cancer and cigarettes. What I hate more is that our medical system believes that chemicals and burning are what will cure someone. They cut the cancer out and yet It's still here and growing. I wish she would try my way and use nutrition to let her body heal itself. It may be too late but It's worth a try.

Grain free and sugar free

In trying to conceive while have PCOS I have read many many articles. Kinda information overload. It's hard to know what works from what worked for one person. With a trial size of one it just is hard for me to know what exactly worked and what was coincidental. Most people are trying so many things at once. I have decided though to radically change mine and husbands diet. We are going to go sugar and grain free as well as eat lots of animal based fats. Raw milk and organic meat. I am really nervous about this as I have been on the sugar addiction cycle for years. My husband and I eat fairly healthy with the exception of drinking soda and eating chips. I am trying to find as many recipes as I can to keep our cravings low. I know we can do it together. Any advice and encouragement will be gladly received.

Caught a case

<p>One of the most annoying things inmates say is " I caught a case." Meaning the now have new charges. However, the vernacular also indicates that they have taken no responsibility in having broken the law. I find it so frustrating. I hear this excuse mostly in regard to their health complaints. How can they have taken care of some chronic condition while released when they "caught a case" now? Never even occurs that had they went to the doctor before instead of breaking the law they wouldn't have such issues. Shocking of course!

Preggo?

I have one daughter and two step children. We have decided to attempt to have one of our own together. I want another baby but I know this will be hard. First I have PCOS and just conceiving will be a challenge. Second our blended family is still having growing pains. My child was an only child for many years. She is adjusting but I can only imagine how hard this is for her. My husband had a boy and a girl. The boy is the first and he is his families pride and joy. It saddens me they ignore thier granddaughter. His ex wife is the opposite and ignores the son. These poor kids may need more than counseling some day. Husband sees this now and treats both kids fairly and is working hard at spending time with both. Both of our kids spend time with the other parents leaving us with alone time. I really love this time. I feel guilty about that and am sad that it will end. I fear though that the child we will have more time with will become favored and that would cause more issues. I pray that God will guide us in this. There are so many challenges that I can see I fear we will be doing a bad thing. I also believe that if I do get pregnant that it is Gods will and it will be ok.

Compassion

Compassionate nurses amaze me. I have lost much of mine working in the jail. I am amazed sometimes that there are good people.
On vacation last week, I forgot my wallet on a cafe table. A random stranger then found me and returned my wallet, all contents remained untouched. She then offered to take a photo of me and my husband. It so surprising and nice. This was how I was raised. My parents are nice and help people. I just forget sometimes and I think I know why.
Today I had to listen to a man cry, sobbing "my life is over, and I have nothing left." He wanted empathy, sympathy, and compassion. I was glad I was not his nurse but just overheard him while in clinic. Why was he so upset and suicidal? He was found guilty of first degree criminal sex crime against his sister. I just thought, what about your sisters life? I could think of nothing that I could have even said to him. Does that make me a bad person?
My prayer is that I can see all people through God' s eyes. Too many times though I find I am a judgment human and too often void of compassion for those I judge based on thier past. Then I think, what God must think of me?